THE ZODIAC WAR
^ _ ` a b c d e f g h i

Chapter 39: Disillusioned Fantasies

"You really think that you have what it takes to be a Zodiac Brave? I don't think you do, Alma..."

"What are you saying? That's a lie, I'm a possessor of the Zodiac Stone, I've known the power of these stones since I was little and my father taught me all about them."

"Do you really know? Or are you just trying to guess and speculate? You nearly messed up before just because you counted Delita as a Brave and nearly wiped out an entire city because of it. In fact you're lucky you found Gemini just in time or Esthar would have been toast. You're a fraud, a failure, and a liar."

"I....I-I'm sorry.....," she gasped between sobs, "I....should have known better."

"Plus, how can you even call yourself an honorable woman for lying to Delita like you did, you and your brother could have told him who you were instead of letting him assume you were dead?"

Alma's weeping echoed across a massive chasm, that may have spilled out below to be heard if Reis wasn't busy dealing with her own dark, faceless enemy.

"Leave me alone! I never hurt anyone!"

"Ha! That's a lie and a half! You think that by proving how strong you are is really going to win over Beowulf? By lying to him and acting like you're an expert Dragoon, when all you've ever known how to do is raise dragons on a farm! What a joke! You hurt him by lying. That--is how you hurt people! Oh sure! You picked up a few tricks of the ol' Dragoon trade along the way to seal up the facade, to add more to the charade, but I know Reis....I wonder what Beowulf would say if he knew the truth about the brave Dragoon Knight who was nothing more than a dragon farm-girl?"

The mocking voice pricked Reis with more venomous needles than any Cactuar ever had in its life time. Feeling weak, she collapsed in dispair.

"How dare you mock the Escutcheon of the Order of Sacred Temple Knighthood! You are a disgrace to your armor, Beowulf. A knight carries not just a sword, but honor, courage, and strength! You, at any rate, have none in any category! You are weak and despicable, you lie to yourself every day saying that what you're doing is right, and that everyone else is wrong! Look at yourself! You're nothing more than a weak pathetic man in a suit of armor. You may have taken the fealty oath, but you were never loyal!"

"SHUT YOUR MOUTH, DAMN YOU!"

"Such vulgar words from a Temple Knight, you should have been excommunicated years ago. Ha! In fact, you might as well have never even become even a simple knight in the first place! You never had the strength to endure it. Always cracking under the pressure of others, going along with the peers. Like a piece of driftwood going along with the tide. You're a vagabond, a vagrant, a wanderer."

"I will kill you where you stand should you utter any more foul lies."

"I sincerely doubt it. You would probably become exhausted looking for me, you're so weak. You only just recently became strong enough to hold that stupid sword, you never fight in combat with your so-called allies, you mostly rely on your weak Status Magic."

Beowulf flew into a berserker rage, slashing at the slimy cavern-like walls, screaming incoherencies left and right.

"How very amusing, don't you think, Agrias, a woman becoming a Holy Knight? It was always in your families' tradition to serve your husbands? Stay at home, raise children, be obedient to your family's will. But you....? No! You abandoned your family in exchange for a sword, very foolish, Agrias."

"I'LL MAKE YOU EAT THOSE FOOLISH WORDS!" Agrias yelled.

"You call me foolish? Was I the one who nearly got lost in the Ice Caverns when they relied on me? Was I the one who ended up severely wounded for trying to attack four Zombies at once. Your symbol is Judgement and yet you are so poor at it. What a failure. You cannot even judge for yourself if you love a man or hate him. It is nothing to you. You aren't a person of Judgement, you're a fool, an idiotic woman who is so blind she cannot even see the truth."

For the first time in years, a single solitary tear fell from Agrias eye, and patted to the ground. Her sword fell out of her hand and she collapsed on both knees, in a silent plea for forgiveness.

"You think you're a mercenary? Ha! What kind of man, promises the woman he cares for that he'll join S.O.L.D.I.E.R. only to fail and end up a guinea pig for a Mako/Jenova experiment, then not show up for seven years, then lie to her, then cheat on her. Then claim to be someone he's not. You know who I think that is! I think he's a weakling! Not a man at all, really. Just a weird spikey-haired kid who just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. Then you claim to save the world, only to lose the woman you truly love, betray your friends, nearly destroy the world you claim to be saving, and then just happen to defeat the center 'bad guy' of it all. Dumb, do-dah, clueless luck, I think. Remember this....?"

With those words, Cloud clutched his head, and felt a massive migraine coming on. He screamed.

"rrrrrr....rrrrrrhaaaaaaaaaaaggggghhhhhh!"

"He's still here you know...you never really did kill him. And now he's your so-called ally. What an idiot! You think you're so tough, and yet you can't seem to defeat your enemies--oh, wait, I mean, you can't defeat your friends....that's it! In fact it seems like you never really killed anyone at all did you! What a weak, pathetic, fool!"

"........Aeris........help me....the pAIN....AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHH!"

At this point in time, though, Aeris was particularly occupied with her own problems.

"No, that isn't true, I would never do that to Cloud!"

"Is that so? It wouldn't be the first time that you've toyed with him. He thinks you love him, and then it turns out you have feelings for the guy that he thought he was. You betrayed him, Aeris. If not in battle, then in the heart. He needed you and all you could think of was yourself and how you felt."

"That can't be true; I won't believe your lies!"

"Are they lies though? You seem to think that Cloud's a tough Soldier and that he could take it if you told him how you really felt. What if I told you that the truth about your feelings would shatter his soul?"

"NO! I couldn't bear that!"

"You say you can't bear it; but you still bear those deeply buried feelings for Zack, and you don't seem to have any indication of letting those feelings go do you? Specifically the ones of Cloud that remind you of Zack. And speaking of betrayal, you say you care for the earth and yet you ignore its cries? You have betrayed the planet and now you have betrayed your people the Cetra as well. Why not just give up believing you're even fit to be a Zodiac Brave? You'll probably betray your friends too."

"...no....I....can't.....I...won't!" gasping for air, Aeris collapsed on the murky floor, in a complete depressed state.

"What about it? Maybe I don't care, so what?"

"So how can you say you're Garnet's guardian when all you can think about is sex and money? What exactly would drive some--thing--like you, a genome of all things, not even human to love a woman! I think it's rather ridiculous. You're basically a toy brought to life. Wound up and pumped with a head full of emotions sent to walk on another planet just to take it over. That's all you'll ever be. Oh sure, maybe stealing is fun, but that will never make you a knight, let alone a guardian."

"Guardian or no! I have a right to live!"

"--That someone else gave you, you seem to misunderstand, you're a doll, an inanimate object brought to life, something that could never amount to being human, monkey-boy!"

Zidane's tail flared up, "RRRRR--I'll beat your ass for that!"

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